無論你的生活如何卑微

簡體傳統

无论你的生活如何卑微，要正视它，生活下去；不要躲避它，也不要恶语相加。你的生活不像你本人那么糟糕。你最富有的时候，你的生活看上去倒是最贫穷的。

吹毛求疵的人即便在天堂也能挑出瑕疵。要热爱你的生活，尽管生活一贫如洗。即使身处贫民院，你也可能享受一段愉快、兴奋、辉煌的时光。西斜的落日映照在贫民院窗户上的余晖，与照射在富贵人家的豪宅上一样光芒万丈；门前的积雪一样在早春消融。我只看到，一个气定神闲的人在那里可以过着自得其乐的生活，抱着振奋乐观的思想，如同居住在皇宫里一般。依我之见，城镇的贫民倒是往往过着最独立的生活。也许他们十分伟大，对任何事情皆可坦然受之。大多数人认为他们不屑于接受城镇的施救；但是实际上他们经常使用不诚实的手段来维持自己的生计，这是更为不体面的。像圣贤一样，如同栽培花园中的花草一般来培养贫困吧。犯不着千辛万苦以求获得新东西，无论是衣服还是朋友。把旧的翻新，回到它们中去。万事万物没有变，是我们在变。

衣服要卖掉，思想要保留。上帝会证明，你并不需要社会。如果我被终日关闭在阁楼的一隅，如同一只蜘蛛，只要我还有自己的思想，那么世界还是原来那样大。一位哲人曾说过：“三军可夺帅也，匹夫不可夺志也。”不要急于谋求发展自己，不要让自己受到各种影响的利用，这全都是浪费。谦卑如同黑暗，展现着天国之光。贫穷与卑贱的阴影笼罩着我们，“看啊!天地万物在我们的眼界中扩大了”。我们常常被提醒，假使上天赐予我们克洛索斯一样的财富，我们的目标必须依然保持不变，我们的手段也将维持基本不变。此外，如果你受到贫困的约束，比如买不起书和报纸，你的经验不过是仅限于最有意义、最为重要的那一部分；你将不得不与那些可以产生最多的糖和淀粉的物质打交道。但是最接近骨头的地方的生活最甜美，你不可能再成为一个无所事事的人。较高层次上的宽宏大量，不会使任何人在较低层次上获得损失。多余的财富只能够买多余之物。人所必需的灵魂是不需要花钱购买的。

我蛰居在一堵铅墙的角落里，铅墙里浇注了一点钟铜的合金。在我正午休息的时候，常常有一阵阵嘈杂不堪的喧闹声从外面传入我的耳中。这是我同代人发出的噪音。我的邻居向我讲述他们与那些知名的绅士淑女之间的奇遇，他们在宴会桌上碰见了哪些显要人物；但是我对这些事情，如同我对《每日时报》的内容一样，毫无兴致。兴趣的对象和谈话的主题主要是围绕服饰打扮和礼节举止；但是呆头鹅总归是呆头鹅，随便你怎么去刻意装扮它。他们向我不断唠叨加利福尼亚和得克萨斯，英格兰和东西印度群岛，来自佐治亚或马萨诸塞的尊敬的某某先生，全是短暂易逝、昙花一现的事情，直到我几乎要像马穆鲁克大人一样从他们的庭院中逃之夭夭。

我喜欢进入我自己的世界——不愿引人注目地走在盛大的游行庆祝队伍中，而愿与宇宙的缔造者平等地并肩同行，如果我可以的话——不愿生活在这个浮躁不安、神经质的、喧嚣忙碌、轻浮浅薄的19世纪，而愿随着19世纪一天天地消逝，或立或坐，思考着。人们在庆祝些什么呢?他们都参加了某个筹备委员会，时时刻刻盼着某个大人物的演说。上帝只是今天的轮值主席，韦伯斯特是他的演说家。那些强烈地、合情合理地引起我注意的事物，我喜爱掂量它们的分量，处理它们，被它们吸引——决不吊在秤杆上来试图减轻重量——对任何事情不妄加推测，而是完全按照其实际情况来处理；只走我自能够走的那条唯一的道路，在这条路上，没有任何力量可以阻止我。在打下坚实稳固的基础之前，就开始着手建造起一座拱门，这不会给我带来任何满足。任何地方的底部都是结实的。我们读到过这样一个故事，一个旅行者问一个男孩，他面前的这块沼泽底部是否坚固。男孩回答说是坚固的。可是不久，旅行者的马深陷沼泽，直到马的腰部，他对男孩说：“我还以为，你告诉我的是这块沼泽底部是坚固的。”“是坚固的啊，”男孩回答，“可是你还没有到达它的底部一半深呢。”社会的泥沼和流沙也是如此，但是只有少年老成的人才了解这一点。

图@Noell S. Oszvald 文@《盛放在呼啸而过的青春》

However mean your life is, meet it and live it; do not shun it and call it hard names. It is not so bad as you are. It looks poorest when you are richest. The fault-finder will find faults even in paradise. Love your life, poor as it is. You may perhaps have some pleasant, thrilling, glorious hours, even in a poorhouse. The setting sun is reflected from the windows of the almshouse as brightly as from the rich man's abode; the snow melts before its door as early in the spring. I do not see but a quiet mind may live as contentedly there, and have as cheering thoughts, as in a palace. The town's poor seem to me often to live the most independent lives of any. Maybe they are simply great enough to receive without misgiving. Most think that they are above being supported by the town; but it oftener happens that they are not above supporting themselves by dishonest means, which should be more disreputable. Cultivate poverty like a garden herb, like sage. Do not trouble yourself much to get new things, whether clothes or friends. Turn the old; return to them. Things do not change; we change.

Sell your clothes and keep your thoughts. God will see that you do not want society. If I were confined to a corner of a garret all my days, like a spider, the world would be just as large to me while I had my thoughts about me. The philosopher said: "From an army of three divisions one can take away its general, and put it in disorder; from the man the most abject and vulgar one cannot take away his thought." Do not seek so anxiously to be developed, to subject yourself to many influences to be played on; it is all dissipation. Humility like darkness reveals the heavenly lights. The shadows of poverty and meanness gather around us, "and lo! creation widens to our view." We are often reminded that if there were bestowed on us the wealth of Croesus, our aims must still be the same, and our means essentially the same. Moreover, if you are restricted in your range by poverty, if you cannot buy books and newspapers, for instance, you are but confined to the most significant and vital experiences; you are compelled to deal with the material which yields the most sugar and the most starch. It is life near the bone where it is sweetest. You are defended from being a trifler. No man loses ever on a lower level by magnanimity on a higher. Superfluous wealth can buy superfluities only. Money is not required to buy one necessary of the soul.

I live in the angle of a leaden wall, into whose composition was poured a little alloy of bell-metal. Often, in the repose of my mid-day, there reaches my ears a confused tintinnabulum from without. It is the noise of my contemporaries. My neighbors tell me of their adventures with famous gentlemen and ladies, what notabilities they met at the dinner-table; but I am no more interested in such things than in the contents of the Daily Times. The interest and the conversation are about costume and manners chiefly; but a goose is a goose still, dress it as you will. They tell me of California and Texas, of England and the Indies, of the Hon. Mr. --- of Georgia or of Massachusetts, all transient and fleeting phenomena, till I am ready to leap from their court-yard like the Mameluke bey.

I delight to come to my bearings -- not walk in procession with pomp and parade, in a conspicuous place, but to walk even with the Builder of the universe, if I may -- not to live in this restless, nervous, bustling, trivial Nineteenth Century, but stand or sit thoughtfully while it goes by. What are men celebrating? They are all on a committee of arrangements, and hourly expect a speech from somebody. God is only the president of the day, and Webster is his orator. I love to weigh, to settle, to gravitate toward that which most strongly and rightfully attracts me -- not hang by the beam of the scale and try to weigh less -- not suppose a case, but take the case that is; to travel the only path I can, and that on which no power can resist me. It affords me no satisfaction to commerce to spring an arch before I have got a solid foundation. Let us not play at kittly-benders. There is a solid bottom everywhere. We read that the traveller asked the boy if the swamp before him had a hard bottom. The boy replied that it had. But presently the traveller's horse sank in up to the girths, and he observed to the boy, "I thought you said that this bog had a hard bottom." "So it has," answered the latter, "but you have not got half way to it yet." So it is with the bogs and quicksands of society; but he is an old boy that knows it. .......